How do I stop blaming others for my financial situation?

Rabbi Landau teaches a sentence to say every morning: “I’m the reason I’m still broke.” It sounds harsh, he admits, “but it’s the most freeing sentence you will ever say.”

Blame feels good: the economy is rigged, the boss is cheap, I never caught a break. But every one of those hands the steering wheel to somebody else. “If you didn’t cause it, you can’t fix it. If you are not the fault, it’s not in your hands.”

The second you say “I’m the reason,” you take full responsibility, and a hundred new opportunities open up. That, he explains, is what the Torah means by “Lo bashamayim hi,” it is not in heaven: “It’s right here, close to you, yours to do.”

“Stop waiting on heaven,” he says. “It’s always in your hand.”

Going deeper: Rabbi Landau's teaching, level by level

Surface claim

Saying “I’m the reason I’m still broke” is the first step out.

Fear, vulnerability, or tension

Blame feels good, but it hands the steering wheel to someone else. If you didn’t cause it, you can’t fix it.

Underlying need or longing

A person wants his life back in his own hands. Taking full responsibility opens new opportunities.

Deepest human truth

“It is not in heaven.” In A Soul at Peace, Rabbi Landau writes that the responsibility for your life and situation is not held by some outside power waiting above; it is very close to you, yours to do.

More questions from this teaching

• What does “lo bashamayim hi,” it is not in heaven, teach about taking responsibility?