Will people take advantage of me if I am too generous?

Rabbi Landau answers with a story. People say that if you are too generous, people will take advantage of you, but he disagrees completely.

He was once sitting with his brother when a man was carried up in a wheelchair by four people. The man said he needed a great deal of money for doctors and had only one chance to save his life, and his brother gave him a huge check. Later, Rabbi Landau happened to look out the window as they left the building and saw the man suddenly walking, “no wheelchair, no nothing.” Upset at the deception, he showed his brother.

His brother’s reaction surprised him: “Wow, I was so sorry for him. Thank God it’s not true. Let him enjoy the money.”

From that moment, Rabbi Landau drew the lesson: “If you’re a good person, you cannot be taken advantage of. You’re just good because you want to be good.” If you gave because you genuinely wanted to give, someone else’s behavior cannot take that goodness away from you.

Going deeper: Rabbi Landau's teaching, level by level

Surface claim

A truly generous person cannot really be taken advantage of.

Fear, vulnerability, or tension

The natural reaction to being deceived is anger. Rabbi Landau himself “couldn’t stand it” when he saw the man walk away healthy.

Underlying need or longing

His brother’s first feeling was relief: “Thank God it’s not true.” His giving came from care for the person, not from a deal.

Deepest human truth

Goodness that comes from wanting to be good does not depend on how the receiver behaves. Someone else’s behavior cannot take it away.