Why can't I move on from the past?

Rabbi Landau explains that people fail to move forward for the same reason Lot's wife became salt. Hashem said, “Al tabit acharecha,” don't look back, and she couldn't resist.

She turned around, longing for the comfort of Sodom, clinging to the past, and she froze forever. “Life has the same rules,” he says.

He uses the picture of a car. “Your windshield is huge. The rearview mirror is very tiny.” Your future is always big, and the past is small. But most people drive with the baggage in the front, replaying pain, blame and old stories, “and then they wonder why they crash.”

Hashem's message, he says, is very clear: “Learn from the past, but don't live there.” Move forward, or you stay stuck like Lot's wife.

Also answered in this teaching

Is it wrong to think about the past at all?

No. Rabbi Landau says to learn from the past but not to live there. In A Soul at Peace he writes that the rearview mirror is there for a reason: glance at it, take the lesson, and bring your eyes back to the windshield.

Going deeper: Rabbi Landau's teaching, level by level

Surface claim

The future is big and the past is small, like a windshield and a rearview mirror.

Fear, vulnerability, or tension

Looking back feels safe. Lot's wife turned around longing for the comfort of Sodom, and she froze.

What may be behind it

In A Soul at Peace, Rabbi Landau writes that Lot's wife did not only turn her head; she turned her heart. Her whole being was still in Sodom.

Deepest human truth

Learn from the past, but don't live there. Hashem's message is to move forward.