I Am a Jew
A Story A story is told about the holy master of Rivnitz, a Hasidic master. In the days of Communist rule, he was put on trial. He knew that a single word could send him to prison for many long years. And yet he was filled with a strange, quiet joy. It was not the joy of a man pushing his fear away, or of a reckless man. It was the joy of someone holding on to something that nobody could touch. The question is simple. Where does joy come from when your whole life is in danger? When a person stands stripped of everything, with no security, no future, nothing at all, what keeps him alive inside? Emptiness as a Question Young married man, you have probably never stood in front of a Communist court. But this situation? You know it. There are times when a person finds himself in a “low place,” as the Hasidic books call it. This is not because of some great sin. It is not because of some dramatic event in his life. It is just emptiness. He is tired of the inner work. He feels that his prayer is not rising. His Torah study feels dry. The “feeling” has gone off somewhere. And quietly, he asks himself: Who am I, really, when I take all of this away? A verse in the book of Ezekiel says: “naked and bare.” The Hasidic books explain that this describes a soul whose garments have been stripped away. The garment of the mind is gone. The garment of feeling is gone. The garment of action is gone. The person stands there with nothing. And he asks: Who am I? An Answer That Is Not a Garment Here is the heart of the matter. When the holy master of Rivnitz stood on trial, he did not tell himself, “I am learning this section of the Talmud. I keep the commandments in this way. I have this good quality or that one.” None of that was there. What he told himself was: I am a Jew. He did not say it out of pride, or to take a stand for his beliefs. He said it because it revealed his very essence. The Tanya, the classic book of Hasidic thought, explains it this way. Inside every Jew there is “a piece of Hashem above, truly.” This is the innermost point of the soul. It does not come from what you do, and it does not depend on what you feel. It is always there. It is an inheritance. It is a “hidden love” for Hashem that comes before everything else, and it needs no garment at all in order to exist. And there is a deep new insight here. It is exactly when the garments fall away that the essence appears. When there is no understanding to hold on to, no feeling, no action, then, and only then, the essence is revealed. As long as a person is wearing his garments, he holds on to the garments. The moment the “nothing” arrives, there is nothing left to hold, except what he truly is. And that is: I am a Jew. This is the special greatness of people who have come back to Hashem. Our Sages said that in the place where such people stand, even the completely righteous cannot stand. This is not because they sinned and came back. It is because they went down to a place where there are no garments, and there they touched the essence. A Note: The Power of a Holy Leader This was the power of the holy master of Rivnitz, and of every true holy leader. He goes down low, “a descent for the sake of a higher ascent.” He does not go down to give a person something new. He goes down to show him what is already inside him. “To go down and bring out the juice from there.” The work is not to make something. It is to uncover something. It is to say to every Jew: See who you are. And even now, even here, even at this low point, you have a personal mission that only you, and only you, can discover.
Putting It into Practice
When you find yourself in a “place” where there is nothing, do not rush to create a feeling. Do not try to “go back” to some earlier state where everything felt whole. Just stand there for a moment. And ask: Who am I, without all of this? The answer is already there: I am a Jew. This is the place to hold on to. This is the point from which, and only from which, a real climb upward can begin.
Questions and answers
Q: Why was the holy master of Rivnitz filled with quiet joy when he stood trial under Communist rule?
Rabbi Landau answers: A story is told about the holy master of Rivnitz, a Hasidic master. In the days of Communist rule, he was put on trial. He knew that a single word could send him to prison for many long years. And yet he was filled with a strange, quiet joy. It was not the joy of a man pushing his fear away, or of a reckless man. It was the joy of someone holding on to something that nobody could touch. The question is simple. Where does joy come from when your whole life is in danger? When a person stands stripped of everything, with no security, no future, nothing at all, what keeps him alive inside?
Q: What should a person do when he feels empty and in a "low place" for no clear reason?
Rabbi Landau answers: Young married man, you have probably never stood in front of a Communist court. But this situation? You know it. There are times when a person finds himself in a “low place,” as the Hasidic books call it. This is not because of some great sin. It is not because of some dramatic event in his life. It is just emptiness. He is tired of the inner work. He feels that his prayer is not rising. His Torah study feels dry. The “feeling” has gone off somewhere. And quietly, he asks himself: Who am I, really, when I take all of this away?
Q: What did the master of Rivnitz tell himself during his trial, and why does it matter?
Rabbi Landau answers: Here is the heart of the matter. When the holy master of Rivnitz stood on trial, he did not tell himself, “I am learning this section of the Talmud. I keep the commandments in this way. I have this good quality or that one.” None of that was there. What he told himself was: I am a Jew. He did not say it out of pride, or to take a stand for his beliefs. He said it because it revealed his very essence. The Tanya, the classic book of Hasidic thought, explains it this way. Inside every Jew there is “a piece of Hashem above, truly.” This is the innermost point of the soul. It does not come from what you do, and it does not depend on what you feel. It is always there.
Q: What does a true holy leader do when he goes down to help a person in a low place?
Rabbi Landau answers: This was the power of the holy master of Rivnitz, and of every true holy leader. He goes down low, “a descent for the sake of a higher ascent.” He does not go down to give a person something new. He goes down to show him what is already inside him. “To go down and bring out the juice from there.” The work is not to make something. It is to uncover something. It is to say to every Jew: See who you are. And even now, even here, even at this low point, you have a personal mission that only you, and only you, can discover.
Q: What should I hold on to when I feel I have nothing left spiritually?
Rabbi Landau answers: When you find yourself in a “place” where there is nothing, do not rush to create a feeling. Do not try to “go back” to some earlier state where everything felt whole. Just stand there for a moment. And ask: Who am I, without all of this? The answer is already there: I am a Jew. This is the place to hold on to. This is the point from which, and only from which, a real climb upward can begin.